Dude's departure on Monday has been hard on all of us. . . .
It's been a long week.
She wasn't doing well all last weekend. She went downhill after I reduced her steroids. . . but, even after I returned to original dosage, she still didn't do any better. We said we would call the doctor Monday. . . All weekend she wasn't eating much, or drinking. . . getting weaker. . . Monday morning, right before Sam went to work, he found her in our room next to the radiator. Sitting and smiling at him. He lifted her to bring her downstairs. . . and she died on the way down the steps.
I think she was waiting for him.
Later that morning, as it all was sinking in, we watched the ravens out the living room window, flying back and forth from Sally's roof to her trees. . . Big, black ravens. . . maybe three of them. . . And wondering. . . .
We kept Jack home from school and buried her next to Tyler at Sam's parents.
Very sad. A lot harder this time. . . More of the same: the house is too quiet.. .just doesn't feel right. But harder. Different.
Max has been depressed. Whining at her after she died. Monday night I took him for a walk, thinking he would be full of crazy energy. . . He spent the whole walk just sniffing at everything. Like he was looking for her. . . Lots of laying around. For a few days, he refused to eat of the food bowl that he had designated as hers.
Jack told me the night before last that his eyes were tricking him, and that he kept seeing Dude around the house. Me too. . .
Doesn't help that we have been stuck in the house with all the snow and cold. Jack had one day off (well, two if you count Monday when we kept him home). . .and two snow delays. . .
But, life is marching on. . . We have been watching the birds at the birdfeeder. . .
And, one evening, we caught a small herd of deer at the birdfeeder trying to eat as well.
Last night, in the car on the way to Target, Jack told us about his two girlfriends on the bus (who happened to be having a fight. . . and him feeling that they have to get along because they are his girlfriends). I am hoping very much that he means that they are friends who are girls, and that he is not a budding polygamist.
Spots of light. . .
Today, Sam had an MRI for his knee. . . hoping all is not so bad. . . He brought us doughnuts on his way home. . . Drank coffee. . . ate breakfast. . .
Luke is happily working on his cutting skills. . . Snipping signs after breakfast next to the warm heater. . . Hanging his little artwork all over the living room. . .
Smiling moments. . .